doing it was really terrifying ..even facing it gives me the goosebumps..failed a lot of times when I was doing it..I got really black ones..ones with loads of carbon on it too..some edible ones..some totally not edible at all..got my family so terrified with me when I am doing it..finally,today I was doing it perfectly..
FINALLY I can fry a fish properly and perfectly..and it even taste good..haha..
though the bed maybe uncomfortable,
but at least let her get some sleep to last her the next day..
though the food are sucky,
but at least let her have some edible ones to fill her tummy..
though injections might hurt,
but at least let the drugs take effect and cure her pain..
though radiotherapy has its consequences ,
but at least dun make it that obvious..
though hairs are dropping,
but at least make her look good in a hat..
though there is still a long journey to recovery,
but at least give her the strength to endure 5 days of pain..
here,I pray for every single thing that will lessen her pain and burden..
design!design!design!dah la loads of assignment,exam also have to be that tough..haih..in the whole exam paper,we only have 10 multiple choices questions..that's only section 1..section 2 consists of 3 practical questions whereby u have to choose 1 and design a logo for a company..after designing the logo,we have rationalize the meaning of the logo..our explaination have to include elements used in logo,principles applied,reasons for usage of colours and shapes plus the main message of the logo..then we have to design the stationary set for the same company(business card,letterhead and envelope)..next,we have to design a poster for some event and a simple postcard..all that in 2 hrs?! I seriously dunno whether is it possible..this exam takes up 60%..haih..
signing off.......
whoa,it already 1 week since I last updated my blog..miss blogging so much but was too tired n too busy to blog...so now,I am giving an overall summary for last week..
Tuesday(15/8/06)-Thursday(17/8/06)
this few days,I was at the very bottom of a whole pile of assignments..first was design assignment..need to draw 3 elephants with different colours..in the end,I have a grey,orange n blue elephant..haha..after getting done with that I have another mass comm assignment whereby we have to rank media according to their crediblity based on 2 current issues..finish that too but have the feeling that it will be rejected..might need to do again..on wednesday,had discussion on the first briefing for the LTC..in the night,started a bit on the logo design n slept at 2..managed to finish the logo design on thursday by sleeping at 3..dead tired eyes..
Friday(18/8/06)
today was a class-free day but had to go to coll to hand in assignments n also the logo design..so went to FAU room n they started making changes in the logo..as for me,I have go home n complete the changes according to their opinions..finished it n then voice chatted with C..it was fun coz I keep critising her idol,Won Bin..had loads of fun talking to her since we don't see each other that much anymore...that nite slept at 2..
Saturday(19/8/06)
woke up at 6 today coz need to prepare for the LTC first briefing..being the OC doesn't seem that easy after all..the briefing went on quite well except for the punishments..was dead tired that day..slept in the train on the way back to Klang..
Sunday(20/8/06)
woke up at 12pm..haha..was really tired..then round 3pm,C n SK came by..my besties came over..was so glad to see them once more..too bad WS can't make it coz she's having her finals..haih..we chatted till 6pm n filled our mouths with junkies till my stomach had no more space for dinner..after dinner,watch some taiwanese soap n went to bed..
and here i am now..blogging my way towards dinner..finals coming in 2 weeks time..die!have a scholarship to maintain.......
chao!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now I am back in KL and I am really worried bout my mom..dunno whether is she fine or not..think I shall call her later..last weekend staying at home was really tiring..had do all sorts of things besides taking care of my mum..had to clean up the house,do the cooking,cope up with homework n etc etc...on Saturday nite,while I was watching tv, my dad heard some sound from the toilet n my mum was in it..so I ran straight to the toilet n there was my mum crying n crying because her stomach hurts a lot...this few days at home I realised that my mum did get a lil better but she has to eat very often and after eating,her stomach will be very painful..I also realised that every single afternoon her stomach hurts the most..I have to rub her back so that all the "wind" in her body would be released...looking at it n recalling all this makes my heart sore..nobody at home can bare looking at my mum's condition now,not even my grandma..how long will I be able to hold on?how strong can I be?I am afraid that 1 day I'll just break down and cry my heart out..staying strong isn't as easy as it is being said..people always say that u should believe in God and everything will be fine,is that true?I doubt that..if it is true,then all this shouldn't have happen to my mum right?she was such a nice person,lending a hand whenever anybody needs help from her..she even help those who had criticise her and treat her badly previously..she doesn't complain about her life and just go with the flow..she was a great mum,wife,daughter,daughter-in-law,sister and friend but..why?WHY?
About 2 months ago,my mum was diagnosed with cancer of the stomach..she underwent her surgery and after that she can barely eat..the best she can do was only to drink fruit juices..later on,she starts adjusting her stomach with soft food and then time after time she can start taking rice once more bit by bit..slowly she was able to eat normally but only in a much more smaller amount than normal human..Now,2 months later she has undergo chemo..As we alll know,chemo seems to be scary to a cancer patient and I can see why now..My mum went for her first cycle of chemo a week ago which only consist of injections for a week..She seem alrite to me then..But today when I came home from college,I was so suprised to see the look on her face..she was so pale adhsive though she was back to square one(I mean after the surgery)..then when I had my lunch,she sat down beside me and told me that she hasn't been eating much since wednesday..basically I can say that she din even eat 1/4 out of 3 meals a day..It was all because of the injection she took on wednesday which contains God knows what kind of drugs that cause her mouth to hurt so badly till she can't eat..gawd!I don't think I can bare looking at her like that..cried a few times today when I saw her suffering..*sob*..this is only the 1st cycle..I dunno how am I gonna bare the upcoming cycles of her chemo..Futhermore my grandmother will be leaving for Ipoh tomorrow..my mum will be left alone with my little brother next week..I am so worried that my bro won't be able to help my mum out with her condition now..HAIH..I feel very helpless too coz there is nothing I can do to prevent her from suffering all this pain..I am so angry of myself..ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!helpless signing off.............
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