I m getting really irritated right now
everything doesn't seem right
facebook's lagging
anti virus's notification keeps popping once in like every few seconds
downloading rates are like 1 byte per second
can't change my email password

that's just my feelings right now
dun mind them
the days are drawing closer and closer
the days I m referring to are my days in uni
2 days from now

I have all sorts of feelings deep down
I'm eager to adapt to the environment and settle down with my studies
I'm feeling nervous as I am meeting strangers
I have the urge to be independent hence lightening my parents' burden
It's all so mixed up
I dun even know what should I feel now

Frankly I'm still not well prepared yet with everything so new to me
The feeling of anxiety is actually the pillar I'm holding on to go on with life in uni
Besides that I had friends to enlighten me about what I am about to face
I'll guess that everything will be just fine when time comes

till then..sayonara!

changes..

I realise I am someone who likes living in the past
I always like taking a stroll down memory lane even though I know that it's time to move on with life
By taking this stroll, I always a feeling of discomfort though I am confident the memories would stay fresh in my mind all the time
Despite the memories, taking a step forward in life seems hard
Accepting the fact that life would be different as the people I meet would be bringing different experience in a whole new stage of life
I wouldn't even know whether will I be accepted well in this society that I have not lived in
A society so unfamiliar to me, I wonder will I be able to fit in at all
I doubt I will be able to adapt to the changes that is waiting for me at the other end of the line where I am standing now

I believe I was where I am 2 years back, only difference is that I had more experience in life, an aim to achieve and the amount of people I got to know grew
Standing at the very same spot again, I began to realise I have to take those steps again to move forward
I do not know whether by taking those steps again, will I be able to survive in that society I am about to face

At times, I tried being optimistic but at the midst of it, the anxiety would just sail through without anchoring
On top of that, I keep telling myself to prepare for whatever that is coming my way and when I am prepared, there's always something there to beat me down and never let me stand strong again be it thoughts or flashes of memories

Believing in ourselves is one of the factors shaping who we are now
My lack of confidence did not bring me far enough to let me stand strong and face all this with a smiling face
Even putting this whole post in place took me an hour and with the company of some emo song to put me in the mood
You may see me as someone with no worries coz that's just a way of keeping myself happy in a crowd and I felt it's hard for me to express my feelings in a speech
Well, just wish me luck in gaining the courage to face whatever I need to in the near future

caryn
this is something for you..to congratulate on ur efforts and being able to let it go in only 4 days..well done dear!
below is the lyrics..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CA1ZDsqauN4

刘力扬 - 眼泪笑了

比想象中更痛 你真的没回头
我命令眼泪不许失控
回忆不跟你走 都挤在我心中
我就有责任让它值得被珍重

谢谢你曾让我难过
谢谢我没有想太多
当爱情左盼右顾的时候

我眼泪都笑了 谁还想哭呢
再勇敢的站着 找回光和热
面对你的时候 我不会舍不得
因为你已是过客 因为路有些曲折
是美的

心碎成了沙漠 就快开凿绿洲
我没有时间不知所措
你温柔的双手 本就不属于我
又何必在乎它以后属于谁呢

谢谢你曾让我难过
谢谢我没有想太多
当爱情左盼右顾的时候

我眼泪都笑了 谁还想哭呢
再勇敢的站着 找回光和热
面对你的时候 我不会舍不得
因为你已是过客 因为路有些曲折
是美的

你眼泪都笑了 谁还会哭呢
来不及完美的 就唱首骊歌
想起你的时候 我不是卑微的
反而我没有遗憾 因为我已爱过你
深深的

CNY '09

I noe this post comes a bit late..
but I just wanna post it..
furthermore I am still in the CNY period..
it's Chap Goh Mei..

so this year's CNY was kinda fun..

I used to travel back to Ipoh with my family to visit my gramdma..

and almost every year it's the same..

we dun really go visiting but this year was really different..

the trip this year had a twist..
my brother and I got to know more about Perak thru my mum n grandma's eyes and perspective..

In my mind all along,Ipoh was a town..nothing different form klang..nothing special..

the only thing I noe is different is of course the food whereby they are way cheaper and way more delicious down that small little town..

but I learned that there is more to it..

there are certain things we can't see in klang..

and comparing klang to Ipoh,I think I would prefer Ipoh..

adventuring in the town with my mum,lil bro n grandma was a great experience..

for once I felt that this CNY is much much more meaningful rather than sitting at home..

so while venturing,we took photos..

my bro n I were so excited..

and we did managed to get some shots..

this is actually some old planes we found next to the airport in Ipoh..my mum told me that the only airport in Perak is actually abandoned but the maintainence is still good..the building is still in good condition from what we can see..

this is another old plane which I find more significant..

this I think would be the biggest outlet of OLDTOWN kopitiam since this is the hometown of this brand..I got another one which is more close up but I dunno where my bro placed it..so just bare with this..it's a 2 storey outlet..

the ever famous tanjong rambutan..it's actually a very small town in perak..n the hospital bahagia ppl always joke about is really there..too bad I can't get a shot coz we can't even see the hospital..

this is the only high school in this town..this town has only one primary school and one high school..imagine klang..how many high school it has?

on the way back from tanjung rambutan,we bump upon this shop by the name of "Soon Choy"..n that is actually my dad's name..we were wondering when did our dad opened a hardware shop back in Ipoh? furhermore he's from klang..

a very beautiful memorial park up in the hills..really beautiful..must cost a lot..

I just find this shot of the tree is really beautiful..the really contrasting colours of the leaves..

the railway station in Ipoh town..see the maintainence there? it is really well kept..in fact I think it looks brand new from far..besides,the town is kinda clean..

this is a shot of a cotton tree..it's kind bald coz the cottons buds are all on the ground..in Ipoh we can find a lot of cotton tree..in fact I have shot whereby the tree is full of cotton..all blossomed..it's really beautiful..looks like snowflakes on trees during winter..again I dunno where my bro placed it..gotta go dig it from him..will show u guys some other time..

well these are some of the shots we took but I can't post them all up here..

the process is just too long..

dragging those photos up n down the screen..

I guess I am getting a lil bias here..

I seem to like my mum's hometown very much now..

despite the good food n good price,there is just so much to see and learn..

I even actually got a chance to visit a chicken farm but we missed it coz my mum's fren went to China for CNY..too bad..

what I've seen is just only half of what is there in the town..

there is just so much to explore more..

the temples in the caves,orchards,those kampungs with big n smelly markets n small stalls selling "chee cheong fun","ABC","char kuay teow" and a load more..

then there is modern part of the town of shopping malls and sunway city of Ipoh..

maybe another trip back there in another year,I would be able explore the whole city..

this is just part of my CNY..

I had an outing with cartoonz and also my coll mates..

Cartoonz..

Date: 31/01/09

Time: 2pm - 12am

Venue: Sunway Pyramid and SS15 Subang (if I am not wrong)

me indulging my peach waffle and wi shan with her american hot dog in waffle world..

brief..

just thought I would drop by to say hie n also a HAPPY CNY to everyone..
might be a bit late but it's still within the CNY period rite?
haha..will post up some pics when I m done compiling them..
futhermore these few days was not really in the mood to blog..

chao!