Saturday, February 21, 2009
everything doesn't seem right
anti virus's notification keeps popping once in like every few seconds
downloading rates are like 1 byte per second
can't change my email password
that's just my feelings right now
dun mind them
the days are drawing closer and closer
the days I m referring to are my days in uni
2 days from now
I have all sorts of feelings deep down
I'm eager to adapt to the environment and settle down with my studies
I'm feeling nervous as I am meeting strangers
I have the urge to be independent hence lightening my parents' burden
It's all so mixed up
I dun even know what should I feel now
Frankly I'm still not well prepared yet with everything so new to me
The feeling of anxiety is actually the pillar I'm holding on to go on with life in uni
Besides that I had friends to enlighten me about what I am about to face
I'll guess that everything will be just fine when time comes
Friday, February 13, 2009
I always like taking a stroll down memory lane even though I know that it's time to move on with life
By taking this stroll, I always a feeling of discomfort though I am confident the memories would stay fresh in my mind all the time
Despite the memories, taking a step forward in life seems hard
Accepting the fact that life would be different as the people I meet would be bringing different experience in a whole new stage of life
I wouldn't even know whether will I be accepted well in this society that I have not lived in
A society so unfamiliar to me, I wonder will I be able to fit in at all
I doubt I will be able to adapt to the changes that is waiting for me at the other end of the line where I am standing now
I believe I was where I am 2 years back, only difference is that I had more experience in life, an aim to achieve and the amount of people I got to know grew
Standing at the very same spot again, I began to realise I have to take those steps again to move forward
I do not know whether by taking those steps again, will I be able to survive in that society I am about to face
At times, I tried being optimistic but at the midst of it, the anxiety would just sail through without anchoring
On top of that, I keep telling myself to prepare for whatever that is coming my way and when I am prepared, there's always something there to beat me down and never let me stand strong again be it thoughts or flashes of memories
Believing in ourselves is one of the factors shaping who we are now
My lack of confidence did not bring me far enough to let me stand strong and face all this with a smiling face
Even putting this whole post in place took me an hour and with the company of some emo song to put me in the mood
You may see me as someone with no worries coz that's just a way of keeping myself happy in a crowd and I felt it's hard for me to express my feelings in a speech
Well, just wish me luck in gaining the courage to face whatever I need to in the near future
this is something for you..to congratulate on ur efforts and being able to let it go in only 4 days..well done dear!
below is the lyrics..
刘力扬 - 眼泪笑了
Monday, February 09, 2009
but I just wanna post it..
furthermore I am still in the CNY period..
it's Chap Goh Mei..
my brother and I got to know more about Perak thru my mum n grandma's eyes and perspective..
this is the only high school in this town..this town has only one primary school and one high school..imagine klang..how many high school it has?
on the way back from tanjung rambutan,we bump upon this shop by the name of "Soon Choy"..n that is actually my dad's name..we were wondering when did our dad opened a hardware shop back in Ipoh? furhermore he's from klang..
a very beautiful memorial park up in the hills..really beautiful..must cost a lot..
I just find this shot of the tree is really beautiful..the really contrasting colours of the leaves..
the railway station in Ipoh town..see the maintainence there? it is really well kept..in fact I think it looks brand new from far..besides,the town is kinda clean..